Send That Man A Calendar
Said Kia Joorabchian about Carlos Tevez's future:
"The contract with United officially runs to until June 31 and we'll respect that."
Which, given that there are only 30 days in June, will be tricky.
Gently Play On Your Heart-Strings
Cesc Fabregas's words about Arsenal this morning were pretty interesting. It's not every day that a captain calls his club 'impotent'.
However, we would quibble slightly with The Sun's treatment of his words this morning.
Our old friend the self-appointed European Football Correspondent of The Sun Anthony Kastrinakis writes: 'In a heart-rending interview he talks about the frustration and pain of four barren years in North London and brands the Gunners "impotent".'
Woah there - heart-rending?
Extremely rich young man is annoyed his team - of which he's a key part - hasn't won anything for a while, and that is supposed to make us all weep at the godless injustice of it all?
Eurotrash
Trawling through the internet all day looking for transfer rumours and whispers makes Mediawatch realise that the brave boys in our press aren't quite the newshounds that they would have you believe. Especially when it comes to stories from beyond these shores.
The Sun's big Cesc Fabregas interview, for example, was given to Spanish sports rag AS.
Meanwhile, Darren Lewis over at The Daily Mirror claims the news that Real Madrid are in for Karim Benzema as an EXCLUSIVE!, but it bares a striking resemblance to a story reported by Madrid mouthpiece Marca yesterday.
Oh, and it was also reported by those famously unreliable filth-peddlers Agence France-Presse.
Also, The Mirror bring us a suspiciously unbylined piece claiming Inter Milan's head honcho Marco Branca was in London yesterday to wrap up the signings of Deco and Ricardo Carvalho. Not shocking news, but news that was nonetheless brought to us yesterday by Italian paper Gazzetta dello Sport.
So if you like your news European, stick to the European news.
Ill Communication
"Anything could happen. It is true that I am in the negotiations but I can't say more than that at the moment. I want to work in the English Premier League" - Ivory Coast coach Vahid Halilhodzic responds to reports that he is in talks with Portsmouth on Sky Sports.com.
"It's complete and utter rubbish. There's nothing in it at all. We've had no discussions or meetings whatsoever" - Portsmouth executive chairman Peter Storrie responds to reports that the club are in talks with Vahid Halilhodzic in The Portsmouth News.
Thunderstrike To The Upper-Right 90!
Perhaps understandably, the three people that care about football in America are quite excited this morning after their brave collection of Bobby Sues and Jimmy Maes beat Spain in the Very Important Confederations Cup last night.
'U.S. Victory Was a Miracle on Grass,' reads the headline from the usually sober New York Times.
The paper goes on to say: 'A performance like Wednesday's, if it can be repeated often enough, could change the way the world views American soccer and perhaps even the way American players view themselves, not as merely able to challenge the top international teams but to beat them.'
Hmmm. Steady on there chaps.
The LA Times seems to think the win was enough for the leader of the free world (self-appointed, we might add) to change his plans.
'Now, President Obama has more reason than ever to visit South Africa.'
Indeed, the paper seems to get a tad ahead of themselves when assessing what this win means for the future: 'It was a watershed moment for the U.S., signalling the team's true arrival on the world stage...No Confederations Cup winner has gone on to win the World Cup the next year, but that will not deter the U.S. from trying.'
Finally, Fox News comes up with the goods to reassure any confused Yankee Doodle who didn't understand why they weren't picking the ball up with some textbook, utterly baffling and largely meaningless numbers:
'Meanwhile, the United States had been 1-7-1 against No. 1 teams, beating Brazil in the 1998 CONCACAF Gold Cup and tying Argentina last summer in an exhibition at Giants Stadium.'
SOCCER ROCKS!
Still, excited as they may be, there's really no excuse for this, a song about something called 'soccer' and how much it 'rocks' by American goal defenseman Jay Demerit.
Take a breath, plug your ears and have a listen.
Stereotypes - A Great Time Saver
We suspect that not even a win like that will change the habits of some Americans though.
Business news channel Bloomberg reported the purchase by ESPN of Setanta's (RIP) broadcasting rights, illustrating their piece with some action shots of some high-profile Premier League players.
The men used? Cristiano Ronaldo and - in maverick fashion - David Weir.
Probably The Best Rumour Of The Day
'Carlsberg is running out of time to negotiate a new shirt sponsorship deal with Liverpool as the Merseyside club hold out for a bumper contract amid interest from a host of leading international companies. Liverpool are looking to strike a deal similar to the £80 million, four-year arrangement that Manchester United secured this month with Aon, the American insurance giant, but Carlsberg is offering only about half that sum.
'The Danish brewer has been Liverpool's main sponsor since 1992, but while talks are continuing and both parties would like their long association to continue, Tom Hicks and George Gillett Jr, the co-owners, believe that the club have been undersold commercially for too long and want a deal that reflects their position as one of the most recognisable brands in world football' - The Times.
Story Of The Day
'Turkey's football authorities were at the centre of a growing scandal this week after a referee they had sacked for homosexuality and outed to the press began fighting back in the courts and the press.
"They thought I was an ant that they could crush, they thought I would run away and hide in a corner," Halil Ibrahim Dincdag said. "But they have destroyed my life and I will fight them to the end."
'Mr Dincdag, 33, from Trabzon, had been refereeing in the local league for 13 years when he was informed this May that his licence would not be renewed. Two days after he appealed his dismissal to the football federation, stories about him began appearing in the national press. As a result he was sacked by the local radio station he worked on and forced to flee to Istanbul to spare his family from an influx of journalists. It was at this point that he decided to come out as gay, while appearing on a popular television sports programme' - The Independent.
Quote Of The Day
"The day the press started writing about me, I went into a coma, and the day I appeared on TV I died" - Halil Ibrahim Dincdag offers a rather dramatic explanation of his plight.
Non-Football Story Of The Day
'Drugged up wallabies are being blamed for creating crop circles in Tasmania. Authorities on the island say the animals eat opium poppies, get high and then hop around in circles, reports the Mercury. Attorney general Lara Giddings told a budget hearing: "The one interesting bit that I found recently in one of my briefs on the poppy industry was that we have a problem with wallabies entering poppy fields, getting as high as a kite and going around in circles. Then they crash. We see crop circles in the poppy industry from wallabies that are high."
'Tasmanian Alkaloids field operations manager Rick Rockliff confirmed that wildlife and livestock which ate the poppies were known to "act weird". "There have been many stories about sheep that have eaten some of the poppies after harvesting and they all walk around in circles," Mr Rockliff said. "But as growers we try our best to try and stop this sort of consumption, particularly by livestock, due to concerns about the contamination of the meat. There is also the risk to our poppy stocks, so growers take this very seriously but there has been a steady increase in the number of wild animals and that is where we are having difficulty keeping them off our land." Tasmania is the world's largest producer of legally grown opium for the pharmaceutical market' - Ananova.
Thanks to today's Mediawatch spotter: Dan Chasemore. If you spot anything that belongs on this page, mail us at theeditor@football365.com, putting Mediawatch in the subject field.
